This is something I hear a lot of and it frustrates me as much as this pane of glass does that lion. People tend to sigh and mutter “it wasn’t meant to be” whenever something fails or goes wrong or just doesn’t turn out the way they’d hoped or expected. For trivial things like missing the bus, losing a game of cards or hoovering up your phone charger, then “it wasn’t meant to be” can easily be roughly translated to “never mind” or, a favourite of mine, “fuck it”. And that’s fine. But for more worthwhile or important matters; you didn’t win that pitch, or hit your sales targets, or you missed out on your bonus, or you didn’t get that job, or you shit yourself in public, then brushing it off, shrugging your shoulders and muttering “it wasn’t meant to be” is an admission of denial.
This psychological projection is a failure to admit that you done something wrong. You made a mistake. You cocked up. You or your ideas weren’t quite good enough this time. You didn’t do as well as you could have or should have. Using this phrase completely fails to acknowledge the fact that you played a part in whatever it was that happened. It brushes off any kind of responsibility or accountability and, more importantly, it blatantly dismisses any opportunity to learn from your mistakes.
It doesn’t matter if you think there’s some crazy, all-powerful force at play in your life preventing you from accomplishing your goals, hampering your hopes and demolishing your dreams, but please don’t do yourself an injustice by avoiding the opportunity to recognise the reasons why you failed, then learn and improve so that you do better next time. Don’t lie to yourself as if there’s nothing you could have done or can change next time. You can’t bullshit a bullshitter.
The same goes for the saying “it was meant to be”. Come on, give yourself some credit.